Tool #3: The Chapters of our Lives
What’s a good book that you’ve read lately? As you think about the book, you’ll likely reflect on the various parts of the story that make it good. There’s an intro, some chapters to get to know the character, the plot thickens with a problem, the characters work through the problem, and then the resolution. Each chapter helps add to the interest of the story which makes the book irresistible to read!
What if your life was a book? Like a book, there would be chapters of varying lengths. Chapters with exciting events, and chapters with more mundane filler to get you to the next chapter. I love using the analogy of chapters in a book for chapters of our lives. It reminds us that nothing lasts forever - both in good ways and bad ways.
What was a chapter that you learned a lot during?
What was an exciting chapter?
What was a painful chapter?
In April, I'll be leading an event using a helpful exercise that allows us to reflect on the chapters of our lives. As I reflect on chapters that have happened to me, below are some examples:
The Painful Birth Chapter: When my first daughter was born, it was a really rough chapter for me! Although the birth of a new baby was so exciting, it was also very jarring. I had an issue breastfeeding and I would not give up (stubborn yes). My daughter wouldn't want to sleep. So I was in physical pain and not sleeping...bad combo.
The Goodbye San Francisco Chapter: And then there are chapters of excitement! I remember preparing to move from San Francisco to NJ for my new job. We made a bucket list of things to do in the San Francisco Bay Area and we were having a blast checking them off. Yes, it made it feel a little sadder to leave such an amazing place but it was fun and we created such amazing memories as a family!
The Big Promotion Chapter: And then professionally, the next chapter was one of such growth for me as I had to start a new team in NYC - from hiring to training, and onboarding. It was thrilling, exciting, and full of hard work. But that chapter is one of the proudest moments in my life.
The Boundary Setting Chapter: Working from home and building my own business taught me that I wasn't creating firm boundaries with my family members, clients, and community members. Everyone wanted more of me and I had to learn how to say no.
These are just some examples from the chapters of my life. Looking back at our chapters can be so helpful. It’s also a great tool to help us be comfortable with where we are now, and have the empowerment to make decisions to write our future chapters.
So what chapter are you in right now? What feels easy, fun, and flowing? What feels challenging and frustrating? What could this chapter be preparing you for in the future? What are the key lessons you are learning now?
As you think about a future chapter in your life, what excites you about that chapter? What can you do now to prepare you for this future chapter?
The Chapters Tool is a helpful reminder to stay present at this moment and enjoy it the best that you can. You don’t know what will happen in the future. AND you can write a new chapter at any moment. You can decide to close one chapter and start a new one.